I haven't written anything in depth for a while on here. I thought it was high time I did.
I'm kind of in between things again. This happens often for me at the moment. When one season is coming to an end and another is waiting to begin. I sometimes find myself getting very restless when this happens and a little impatient. When I need to remember that it's a marathon not a sprint.
Also what might feel like a detour to you. I'm learning that they are just part of the journey. That each moment follows the next and all can be learned from and are spaces to grow.
When I've so many thoughts going through my head. It's hard to find time to process stuff. But when life gets unpredictable I'm learning that I still need to make time for myself. Instead of being stuck in the cycle of work/home/sleep and repeat. I've been stuck in that cycle for too long. It gets me exhausted and it's no way to live.
I'm working at having a life that works for me. Where there is plenty of space to be me. It's no fun spending your life in a box that someone has put you in. You don't need to stay there. You don't need to fit into someones idea for your life. For me it's important to have down time. To create ways of dealing with stress in a healthy way and preferably to have less of it. Also not piling blame on yourself. Often times we need to be kinder to ourselves and in turn we'll be kinder to others.
Life doesn't need to be lived in the fast lane. There is something to be learnt from living life slow. Life to me feels more meaningful this way. In appreciating nature, walks in woods, making things and the satisfaction that brings.
At the moment to combat that I do my best to make time for things that calm me for me this looks like walks, photography, knitting, time spent with good friends, traveling. That would equal a much happier Carole.
So much to process from the past six months (I started working on this post during the middle of last month) so it’s past the six month mark now. Continuing to learn more about myself, how I react and deal with events. Things have been hard. But looking back also rewarding too.
That when you’re having times when you’re struggling it’s so okay to say you’re not okay. And to get support from those around you. It helped so much having people I could speak to, be there when I was crying. And afterwards feeling much better.
A few months back I posted this..
No matter what trials we face in life I’m learning to remind myself that these experiences are not wasted. I’ve grown more in my faith, standing on what His word says about me. In who’s I belong to and that am precious and valuable to Him.
That trials and challenges can also help other people along the journey in ways you never expected when you were in the middle. These realisations make my heart happy.
There have been many times when I have struggled to speak well of people. Particularly when I have been hurt by them. Those I find hardest to love. But I’m realising more and more that those who have hurt me are hurting too. And when I forgive it is so freeing. Like a weight has been lifted and some chains broken.
Because unforgiven things otherwise can be dragged around causing pain. When I’m not forgiving people I am not choosing to love them well.
Also learning not to be so hard on myself and being content with where I am now. To enjoy these days. Seeing how far I’ve come but also realising that not knowing what’s next is okay too. To continue doing things that bring me joy. To keep going on adventures, collecting memories, taking pictures, being crafty, reading..
Appreciating nature, time with those I love, and to keep writing…
Here’s to learning to be better at being loving to ourselves and those around us.